he has some compartmentalizing to do which is still a work in progress, but regardless of where he ends up, he'll be here regardless. not in the primrose suite, but wherever else hwylryn goes after he's experienced the Photobooth and had some time to himself.
there's no sound to announce his arrival, but he does call out to make himself known immediately, hand outreached. ]
( late night wednesday probably works... post midnight on technically-thursday...???
After the necessary resolution at the photobooth, Hwylryn drifted toward a dimmer section of the aquarium, and simply stayed there. Unlike his usual habit, he has not gotten into the tank once - instead, he's sat upon a plush bench, and has been staring at the main tank, from that distance, for this full length of time. In his lap, in his hands, is a cold hot chocolate - undrank; taken, like many things he takes, just to have.
He does not look up immediately when he hears this familiar voice, but he does not avoid it. His eyes turn toward Ish, brows furrowed slight, a smile worked on his lips. It does not seem fake, so much as it seems the expression of an aching wound; raw, and untreated. )
... Ish.
( A beat, and he sets the cup aside. He drifts toward Ish, and to this outstretched hand, if Ish allows it, is Hwylryn placing one hand below it, and one hand above. He clasps it from both sides, and speaks softly: )
I know. [ he doesn't deny this, nor does he deny the way hwylyrn captures his hand.
his lips are still curved into the slight smile he had when he appeared and for a moment he simply looks down at hwylryn, almost a mirror to what was not even a day ago. time's a funny thing and he still doesn't know what he's thinking (will he ever know?), but that doesn't stop him from taking his other hand to gently cup hwylryn's cheek if he doesn't resist. ]
A sort of relief crossed his expression, despite his eyes reddish from his earlier tears, like maybe there was a sense that all this between them would be gone. But it remains, and it's just ... complicated.
That's all right. Things don't have to be simple for him to love them. )
... Please, stay with me.
( He presses his cheek to Ish's palm.
His dragon, which has been flopped out in a wiggly line a completely still on the couch, its eyes closed, begins to stir slightly. )
Alright. Then, somewhere else? I'll pick. [ he doesn't mind staying here, but as he looks at the little dragon stir slightly, his instincts whisper in his ear. ]
( He's fine with moving. It's not like he was swimming; just wallowing, and tormenting himself, a little - reminding himself how far he was from his real body, and the sea.
He lets the hand above Ish's hand drop and holds him with his other hand tight. )
( Oh - settling into his footing, Hwylryn takes a look at his surroundings, his gaze tracing the architecture, the gardens, the distance - and all the way up into the stars above. He exhales - and then inhales it deep, feeling the clarity of nature flow through him, and the soft, warm echo of Ish's magic.
His dragon, too depressed to do much at all the way Hwyl was treating himself in the aquarium, has roused here, though it still remains a little sedate - pushing off from Hwylryn's shoulders and returning to its usual, gentle orbit around him, before breaking off toward the sky, though it doesn't go far. Hwylryn wishes he could still fly. )
... It's so beautiful. Have you ever stepped up into it?
( He squeezes Ish's hand, looking back at him. He looks a little like a sick fish placed back in clean waters. Not fixed, but boundless sky does wonders for a creature born from the union of it and sea. )
[ ish smiles back, with a small tilt of his head in ask.
he's not paying attention at all to the scenery even if he too, is something born of nature, that prefers the open skies to vaulted ceilings and gildened. all of his focus is on hwylryn, the way he's looking and how he sounds. ]
( sigh he can tell ish is probably trying to make him feel better... sigh he can't help but value that...
He still sounds a little dimmed from all of the photoroom stuff, and the whiplash of it all, but, in the same way he cannot help but respond to nature, he cannot help but respond to sincerity. His eyes light up... )
We can, but first— [ he squeezes hwylryn's hands tightly and then let's go, forgive him his eyes say—
—he needs both his hands to take off his coat and wrap it over hwylryn's shoulders, carefully and with purpose. it's a simple gesture, one he could have done with magic, but he opts to do it with his own hands instead. it's probably a little big considering the difference in their builds, but all the better to keep hwylryn warm. when he's done, he threads their fingers together again. ]
( Oh... Has someone done this to him before? If they have, he can't recall - his past several hundred years were in the sea, and he only traveled far as shore when he left it. It's a fresh gesture, and it's sweet - with a little more weight that Ish does it without magic.
He clasps their hands tight, really... really happy with the threaded fingers... He pulls the coat a little more firmly over himself - or maybe because he doesn't want to let go of the gesture so quick, or maybe he does it a little anxiously (in a good way), because he's never had someone else take him into the sky before? Despite everything, he can't help but be curious - excited - to know what it's like, the roles reversed after so many thousands of years.
[ instead of teleporting them, this he also does manually, by any definition of magic where it takes moments and isn't instantaneous. they float up, like a bubble, a private space just for them, just like it was yesterday. time is funny like that.
maybe that's why ish laughs a little, a chuckle really. again, he's feeling so much. ]
This is cheating. [ being up here where no one else can go? being together like this, in spite of well, everything?
he tugs hwylryn closer, the gesture shy but also somehow sure. ]
( Hwylryn is selfish enough to enjoy the privilege!! Yes, no one else gets this (maybe. he hopes, secretly). Yes, he thinks there are others who need this - deserve this - and you know what, if he were a better person, a more principled person, he'd be focused on their predicament, and the people he loves who want out, desperately.
But if he did that, he couldn't also have this. And that is the crux of his problem: liking too much, liking too many, and wanting his cake and to eat it too. No wonder his loves come to blows, in the end, when he can't help but like both sides without restraint.
The photo thing still hurts, a lot. And it's maybe something, like all the other things in this carnival, he objectively shouldn't forgive. He does think... maybe, there's still something talk about there. But he's just not someone who can carry these things - that he's been forced to carry grief has been enough to madden him. It is against his nature; he, who flows as the river, the muck dispersed, the water murmuring, I'll forgive you, so let's play again, as he had with Snow and White, every time. )
... Have you ever taken up anyone else like this?
( The shyness is sweet. He leans against Ish, head on his shoulder and hands clasped tight, in this little space that's just the two of them. )
[ he murmurs agreement; again, fun isn't what he'd call it but the sentiment is close enough. for all that the photo booths were and for all he hasn't spoken of an apology, the way he looks at hwylryn is exactly the same as he did wednesday. ]
No, I've never. And I never will. I'll only take you. [ even if it's cheating. even if the past day has made him realize he probably shouldn't have found his way here in the first place. but-
the wind jingles his earrings, now plural, and they catch in the moonlight. he has more he should probably say, but instead, he dips down to press a kiss against silver strands that are brighter to him than the moon.
( When was the last time someone offered something to him, and him alone?
It's okay that people don't. It's fine. He's too old, at this point, to really mind - to fail to understand that people are complex, and they have a scale of needs and priorities, and that they can't just give him, and only him, something; that they can't just think of him the most, that they have - other things - other people, just as important, or moreso. And if he understands someone, he can't really hate them (he can only find things about them that he likes, and that's where the trouble begins).
So it flushes his cheeks in a way he doesn't expect when Ish says this thing and presses a kiss to his head and it's tied with the ribbon of an apology. It makes him happy in a way he hasn't known in a long time. And somewhere in the wind and the stars and moonlight, somewhere in the new sound of two earrings, he wonders, maybe, if... )
... What comes after everything? ( This would be a great segue into plot. But put a pin in that because Hwylryn's brain isn't even there right now. ) After all of this ends...
( The carnival, the trials, the spell— Ish is the one who's mentioned forever, never, always. So he can ask, right? He told Junior he'd look around, anyway. He'd already said he'd try to live. Right? So, so,
He looks up at Ish as if he were a part of all the sky from where his head rests, his gaze not necessarily shy, but - wondering, maybe. A little hesitant. A little excited. )
[ oh—his eyes catch on the silver, the dust of red like a rose bloomed under the moonlight only for him. the way hwylyrn looks in his jacket (this one is solely his fault), the way hwylyrn looks up at him with a mix of emotions he didn't expect to see. he can feel them even if he's not trying, as close as they are.
he doesn't know what comes after all of this ends because the end of it is something he's only caught sight of extremely recently (he thinks, he thinks, he's had so much to think about this week).
there's norna and—the thought of her is hard to place. she is everything, she will always be everything. just the thought of her makes his heart beat faster like it always does. but there's something else in it this time, a soft new sound that he recognizes because of what he is. he's too afraid to name it yet.
he pulls them closer and if he were in serpent form he wouldn't stop until he filled in every crevice, every space until they were one sea reflecting the starry sky above.
he wants to ask "are you sure?", "why?", but he doesn't need to, he hasn't needed to since their exchange in the grotto. a stupid, impulsive thing, maybe even a little spiteful back then.
times a funny thing, he thinks for the Nth time this week. back then it was "for now" and that now is also here and—]
I'm not sure yet. [ what's after, it's all changing so quickly. ]
But you can come with me, I'd like that. A lot.
[ it's a dangerous, dangerous thing, but one he can't deny. even if he wanted to. everything feels like liquid and he's not sure if he's drowning but he smiles anyway. ]
( Ah, he was right, he was right - and is there any feeling more wonderful than knowing your hearts have aligned? )
Then we can find out.
( We, together. For someone who was going to die in the space beyond, the uncertainty isn't so scary - for someone who is an expression of impulse and feeling, he doesn't think too careful about what this means for taking Junior with him. There is simply a warmth in his body that fills him with every rapid heartbeat, as if it were an opened valve - and if he drowns in that, so be it. If he drowns in that, he'll see that he drags down his loves with him.
Maybe someone consumed with grief twice over shouldn't be making such precarious calls with a third love that's had a rapid onset, but - ah, he cannot help what he is. He cannot help but sink deeper and deeper, unable to change his nature, unable to escape that he is a thing full of instinct and love.
He reaches up with his other hand, catching Ish's cheek and pressing a kiss to his lips - long beneath the moonlight and stars, but very, very sweet. )
[ despite all his meaningful gestures, his affections and the way he's looked at hwylryn tonight—he was waiting for something else. surely hwylryn would have been mad at him, yelled at him or given him the cold shoulder or worse. ish is cruel, he really, really, is but he's also a creature of love. that came first before everything else he's become.
he's wanted to kiss him properly but hasn't felt like he's deserved it, and so when hwylryn takes the initiative something blossoms in his chest. he won't pull back first this time even if he should have, but he doesn't drown even if he's breathless and even if they definitely dipped just a little in their levitation from his complete lack of focus. ]
I do. What kind of music shall we dance to? [ one hand moves to hwylryn's back, the other clasping their hands together. he was quite practiced at dancing once and his time here has dusted off his skills so they shine again. ]
( He smiles bright, not at all a formal dancer, but he's picked up enough over the years that he can follow once Ish takes position. If there's anything the spirits of nature adore, it's passion, music, and dance.
He clasps Ish's hand in his, the other at the crook of his neck - maybe not precisely the right place - but it means he can stroke him fondly before moving his hand a little further down the shoulder. Ish's hands there mean he should take up a stance around here, right? Close enough! Fun enough! They'll figure it out, turn by turn. )
Right now I'm happy, so I want something that matches the beat of my heart.
( He's refined enough to slow dance, but right now, does that feel right? He thinks they're both in an improved mood, so why not celebrate it? )
I don't have one yet. [ yet, it'll probably be whatever they dance to here because he's sunk. ]
Hmmm... maybe something like this? [ i am mobile so save me from proper form for this, but an energetic, bouncy song for a foxtrot filters through the night. he is not from a world with the tango or salsa, so this is the best he can do. ]
( Given he's from a high fantasy setting, a foxtrot probably sounds modern and novel to his ear - Hwylryn listens along for a few moments, then smiles bright. He likes the sound, but, more importantly, he likes that Ish picked it. )
It's perfect. ( It's perfect because it's them, and what more does it need? ) Is there a particular way you dance to it?
( Not that he needs one, but he's curious to know! )
It starts like a waltz, but it has fast movements to it. Slow-slow-quick-quick steps that build off each other.
[ much like how their interactions have gone, really. things were slow until they suddenly were Not and now they're here, moving too fast by any definition of the phrase but.
isn't that just them too?
accompanying tune that's perfect (I take no credit except ish's ability to make this IC reality). ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
week iii, wednesday late/early thursday????
he has some compartmentalizing to do which is still a work in progress, but regardless of where he ends up, he'll be here regardless. not in the primrose suite, but wherever else hwylryn goes after he's experienced the Photobooth and had some time to himself.
there's no sound to announce his arrival, but he does call out to make himself known immediately, hand outreached. ]
Hwylryn.
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After the necessary resolution at the photobooth, Hwylryn drifted toward a dimmer section of the aquarium, and simply stayed there. Unlike his usual habit, he has not gotten into the tank once - instead, he's sat upon a plush bench, and has been staring at the main tank, from that distance, for this full length of time. In his lap, in his hands, is a cold hot chocolate - undrank; taken, like many things he takes, just to have.
He does not look up immediately when he hears this familiar voice, but he does not avoid it. His eyes turn toward Ish, brows furrowed slight, a smile worked on his lips. It does not seem fake, so much as it seems the expression of an aching wound; raw, and untreated. )
... Ish.
( A beat, and he sets the cup aside. He drifts toward Ish, and to this outstretched hand, if Ish allows it, is Hwylryn placing one hand below it, and one hand above. He clasps it from both sides, and speaks softly: )
That was cruel.
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his lips are still curved into the slight smile he had when he appeared and for a moment he simply looks down at hwylryn, almost a mirror to what was not even a day ago. time's a funny thing and he still doesn't know what he's thinking (will he ever know?), but that doesn't stop him from taking his other hand to gently cup hwylryn's cheek if he doesn't resist. ]
What can I do for you? Right now.
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A sort of relief crossed his expression, despite his eyes reddish from his earlier tears, like maybe there was a sense that all this between them would be gone. But it remains, and it's just ... complicated.
That's all right. Things don't have to be simple for him to love them. )
... Please, stay with me.
( He presses his cheek to Ish's palm.
His dragon, which has been flopped out in a wiggly line a completely still on the couch, its eyes closed, begins to stir slightly. )
It doesn't matter where.
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Alright. Then, somewhere else? I'll pick. [ he doesn't mind staying here, but as he looks at the little dragon stir slightly, his instincts whisper in his ear. ]
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( He's fine with moving. It's not like he was swimming; just wallowing, and tormenting himself, a little - reminding himself how far he was from his real body, and the sea.
He lets the hand above Ish's hand drop and holds him with his other hand tight. )
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Then come with me. [ tonight his magic feels just a bit warmer, and in a moment the aquarium fades away to the nightsky above.
welcome to the roof, though really it's all about the view. ]
How about this?
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His dragon, too depressed to do much at all the way Hwyl was treating himself in the aquarium, has roused here, though it still remains a little sedate - pushing off from Hwylryn's shoulders and returning to its usual, gentle orbit around him, before breaking off toward the sky, though it doesn't go far. Hwylryn wishes he could still fly. )
... It's so beautiful. Have you ever stepped up into it?
( He squeezes Ish's hand, looking back at him. He looks a little like a sick fish placed back in clean waters. Not fixed, but boundless sky does wonders for a creature born from the union of it and sea. )
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[ ish smiles back, with a small tilt of his head in ask.
he's not paying attention at all to the scenery even if he too, is something born of nature, that prefers the open skies to vaulted ceilings and gildened. all of his focus is on hwylryn, the way he's looking and how he sounds. ]
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He still sounds a little dimmed from all of the photoroom stuff, and the whiplash of it all, but, in the same way he cannot help but respond to nature, he cannot help but respond to sincerity. His eyes light up... )
Can we?
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—he needs both his hands to take off his coat and wrap it over hwylryn's shoulders, carefully and with purpose. it's a simple gesture, one he could have done with magic, but he opts to do it with his own hands instead. it's probably a little big considering the difference in their builds, but all the better to keep hwylryn warm. when he's done, he threads their fingers together again. ]
Ready?
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He clasps their hands tight, really... really happy with the threaded fingers... He pulls the coat a little more firmly over himself - or maybe because he doesn't want to let go of the gesture so quick, or maybe he does it a little anxiously (in a good way), because he's never had someone else take him into the sky before? Despite everything, he can't help but be curious - excited - to know what it's like, the roles reversed after so many thousands of years.
He glances up, meeting Ish's eyes with his. )
Uh-huh. Ready whenever.
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maybe that's why ish laughs a little, a chuckle really. again, he's feeling so much. ]
This is cheating. [ being up here where no one else can go? being together like this, in spite of well, everything?
he tugs hwylryn closer, the gesture shy but also somehow sure. ]
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( Hwylryn is selfish enough to enjoy the privilege!! Yes, no one else gets this (maybe. he hopes, secretly). Yes, he thinks there are others who need this - deserve this - and you know what, if he were a better person, a more principled person, he'd be focused on their predicament, and the people he loves who want out, desperately.
But if he did that, he couldn't also have this. And that is the crux of his problem: liking too much, liking too many, and wanting his cake and to eat it too. No wonder his loves come to blows, in the end, when he can't help but like both sides without restraint.
The photo thing still hurts, a lot. And it's maybe something, like all the other things in this carnival, he objectively shouldn't forgive. He does think... maybe, there's still something talk about there. But he's just not someone who can carry these things - that he's been forced to carry grief has been enough to madden him. It is against his nature; he, who flows as the river, the muck dispersed, the water murmuring, I'll forgive you, so let's play again, as he had with Snow and White, every time. )
... Have you ever taken up anyone else like this?
( The shyness is sweet. He leans against Ish, head on his shoulder and hands clasped tight, in this little space that's just the two of them. )
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No, I've never. And I never will. I'll only take you. [ even if it's cheating. even if the past day has made him realize he probably shouldn't have found his way here in the first place. but-
the wind jingles his earrings, now plural, and they catch in the moonlight. he has more he should probably say, but instead, he dips down to press a kiss against silver strands that are brighter to him than the moon.
"sorry." ]
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It's okay that people don't. It's fine. He's too old, at this point, to really mind - to fail to understand that people are complex, and they have a scale of needs and priorities, and that they can't just give him, and only him, something; that they can't just think of him the most, that they have - other things - other people, just as important, or moreso. And if he understands someone, he can't really hate them (he can only find things about them that he likes, and that's where the trouble begins).
So it flushes his cheeks in a way he doesn't expect when Ish says this thing and presses a kiss to his head and it's tied with the ribbon of an apology. It makes him happy in a way he hasn't known in a long time. And somewhere in the wind and the stars and moonlight, somewhere in the new sound of two earrings, he wonders, maybe, if... )
... What comes after everything? ( This would be a great segue into plot. But put a pin in that because Hwylryn's brain isn't even there right now. ) After all of this ends...
( The carnival, the trials, the spell— Ish is the one who's mentioned forever, never, always. So he can ask, right? He told Junior he'd look around, anyway. He'd already said he'd try to live. Right? So, so,
He looks up at Ish as if he were a part of all the sky from where his head rests, his gaze not necessarily shy, but - wondering, maybe. A little hesitant. A little excited. )
... Could I stay behind with you?
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he doesn't know what comes after all of this ends because the end of it is something he's only caught sight of extremely recently (he thinks, he thinks, he's had so much to think about this week).
there's norna and—the thought of her is hard to place. she is everything, she will always be everything. just the thought of her makes his heart beat faster like it always does. but there's something else in it this time, a soft new sound that he recognizes because of what he is. he's too afraid to name it yet.
he pulls them closer and if he were in serpent form he wouldn't stop until he filled in every crevice, every space until they were one sea reflecting the starry sky above.
he wants to ask "are you sure?", "why?", but he doesn't need to, he hasn't needed to since their exchange in the grotto. a stupid, impulsive thing, maybe even a little spiteful back then.
times a funny thing, he thinks for the Nth time this week. back then it was "for now" and that now is also here and—]
I'm not sure yet. [ what's after, it's all changing so quickly. ]
But you can come with me, I'd like that. A lot.
[ it's a dangerous, dangerous thing, but one he can't deny. even if he wanted to. everything feels like liquid and he's not sure if he's drowning but he smiles anyway. ]
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Then we can find out.
( We, together. For someone who was going to die in the
space beyond, the uncertainty isn't so scary - for someone who is an expression of impulse and feeling, he doesn't think too careful about what this means for taking Junior with him. There is simply a warmth in his body that fills him with every rapid heartbeat, as if it were an opened valve - and if he drowns in that, so be it. If he drowns in that, he'll see that he drags down his loves with him.
Maybe someone consumed with grief twice over shouldn't be making such precarious calls with a third love that's had a rapid onset, but - ah, he cannot help what he is. He cannot help but sink deeper and deeper, unable to change his nature, unable to escape that he is a thing full of instinct and love.
He reaches up with his other hand, catching Ish's cheek and pressing a kiss to his lips - long beneath the moonlight and stars, but very, very sweet. )
Do you want to dance?
( Up here, in the sky! )
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he's wanted to kiss him properly but hasn't felt like he's deserved it, and so when hwylryn takes the initiative something blossoms in his chest. he won't pull back first this time even if he should have, but he doesn't drown even if he's breathless and even if they definitely dipped just a little in their levitation from his complete lack of focus. ]
I do. What kind of music shall we dance to? [ one hand moves to hwylryn's back, the other clasping their hands together. he was quite practiced at dancing once and his time here has dusted off his skills so they shine again. ]
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( He smiles bright, not at all a formal dancer, but he's picked up enough over the years that he can follow once Ish takes position. If there's anything the spirits of nature adore, it's passion, music, and dance.
He clasps Ish's hand in his, the other at the crook of his neck
- maybe not precisely the right place - but it means he can stroke him fondly before moving his hand a little further down the shoulder. Ish's hands there mean he should take up a stance around here, right? Close enough! Fun enough! They'll figure it out, turn by turn. )
Right now I'm happy, so I want something that matches the beat of my heart.
( He's refined enough to slow dance, but right now, does that feel right? He thinks they're both in an improved mood, so why not celebrate it? )
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Hmmm... maybe something like this? [ i am mobile so save me from proper form for this, but an energetic, bouncy song for a foxtrot filters through the night. he is not from a world with the tango or salsa, so this is the best he can do. ]
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It's perfect. ( It's perfect because it's them, and what more does it need? ) Is there a particular way you dance to it?
( Not that he needs one, but he's curious to know! )
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[ much like how their interactions have gone, really. things were slow until they suddenly were Not and now they're here, moving too fast by any definition of the phrase but.
isn't that just them too?
accompanying tune that's perfect (I take no credit except ish's ability to make this IC reality). ]
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Lead me? I've never done a waltz before either, but you can count on me to learn pretty quick.
( Especially for someone who doesn't usually have legs like these. )
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though after not too long— ]
You're beautiful, Hwylryn.
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