[ the door to the greenhouse swings open when hwylryn approaches it, come in says the gesture sans any proper welcome. ish is inside where you would expect him to be, seated on the chaise in a considerably dressed down outfit compared to his usual. shirt in purple, of course. he's working on something, several books floating around him, their pages filled with complex diagrams and runes.
( Ah... Ish hadn't given him this sort of attitude even when he was playing as Witch, had he? That's rough. )
... Am I interrupting?
( He'll enter since he was implicitly invited in, and though he spends a moment studying Ish and his work, he'll pass Ish to set the bucket gently on the table and begin setting out his things. )
I wanted to congratulate you, from the bottom of my heart.
( He sets out the tea tray with particular care, given its tiers. The effort occupies a few moments, where he purses his lips, quiet. )
... I also wanted to apologize, if you would have it.
( He sets down a bottle, also gentle. There's barely a clink a that doesn't come from his jewelry, anyway - as he works. )
But... I can return when you aren't busy, if this isn't an ideal time.
( This is all partly because he wasn't considerate of Ish, so... he'd rather not do the same thing again... But he might be feeling more hesitant because he had Primrose really on his case yesterday, and it's still fresh in his mind. )
Huh? [ he says that and finally looks up. yes he is busy and more than that he's tired, which hwylyrn will be able to tell instantly once he gets a good look at him. ]
[ this naturally includes ish getting a good look himself and—hello.
that sure is midriff he's seeing and more than that, it's hwylryn dressed in red. please ignore one of the floating books falling to the floor with a thud. he'll pick it up later. ]
[ alright his braincells have been picked up off the floor, so all of that aside. it's not a proper smile, but his expression softens and the other book he was working on snaps shut and floats to the table. ]
Come here. [ holding out his hand, sit with him. ]
( Well, Ish's confused remark certainly calls his attention - and the fallen book moreso.
More than anything, he seems a mixture of sad and relieved - relieved that Ish isn't Mad-mad at him (yesterday was stressful for him), but sad that Ish seems so tired.
Despite everything he's balancing in his heart, he does take his hand, lacing their fingers, and he does come to sit beside him on the chaise - sitting right up next to him, looking up at him like 🥺... i'm sowwyyyyy... )
Though still a little ragged from yesterday, the shift in Hwylryn's demeanor is like sun crossing the sea. His eyes shine bright, and without hesitation, he'll help shift himself onto Ish's lap - where he's wanted to be since last trial - gently, affectionately, taking his face in both his hands. )
... When now, more than ever, you deserve the rest?
( He noses him affectionately - more the gesture of a dragon than someone in the shape of a person. )
But I'm not the sort to deny my sweet witch his reward.
( He kisses him - light at first, and cute; but his lips part, and on his tongue there is the taste of fruit and tea treats and chocolate - his samplings from the tea and wintering rooms before he decided to bring them in.
The way he kisses him, rather than apology, seems to say I missed you - as if the time since trial was unbearable, as much as it's barely a drop of time in his long life; as if seeing him, but only seeing him upset, made the ache that much worse. And it did. )
[ ish had absolutely wanted hwylryn in his lap, he made that much clear. but his extent of asking was to simply have him closer so he could wrap his arms around him. he's wanted to do that since Sunday but he couldn't, and sometimes he says things that are smoother than even he realizes.
all of this is to say he was not expecting kisses, much less kisses like these. not that it stops him from accepting them, a relieved sigh escaping his lips somewhere in the middle.
he pulls back once he thinks hwylryn has been able to breathe again himself, because he feels that ache in him through his lips and tongue.
a now familiar flush paints his cheeks when they part. ]
It had slipped out so easily, despite his reservation - he'd been trying to be careful with his words around Ish, trying to gauge their pace with care, because he's never... had someone who liked him in turn, like this, to this extent. He hadn't gone as far as daring to think of Ish as solely for him - or so he'd thought. But maybe... a part of him wanted it more than his logical mind told himself to heel, and be patient.
His cheeks warm a little as he hesitates, but he decides all he can do is give voice to his heart, as he always does. )
... I want you to be. Can you?
( He brushes Ish's hidden cheek lightly with his thumb. Ish's face is so endearing, as always... he wishes he could swallow him up (metaphorically)... )
[ he has to think on this, so it's good that hwylryn didn't rush forward with it anymore than they're already rushing. his feelings on it are ultimately complicated, but it's one thing they'll have to discuss eventually.
( Hwylryn has to think on this, too. It's selfish to ask someone to be his when he hadn't considered returning the same, and to this his only defense is that he hadn't thought of any of this at all.
He had never been so contained - to belong to but one person, to define himself by someone else. To reduce his vocabulary, how he may communicate with others, like Yoru. And it may as well be forever, if their lifespans proceeded, uninterrupted.
He strokes Ish's cheek with his thumb as he considers this. )
[ paradoxically, aside from Norna, ish cares the most about freedom. the freedom of others more than his own, but freedom nonetheless. and yet he chains the hearts of those he wants to guide, kidnaps others in pursuit of his fervent delusions.
he doesn't want to chain hwylryn, because one of the things that attracts him the most is his free spirit. yet hwylryn is the one who asked him for these terms: saying no would be denying him in a matter of the heart. that's not something he wants to do ever, if he can help.
maybe he shouldn't have said "only" because he knows that you can belong to more than one person, even if it's never something he's considered himself. but that's truly what he thought: who else would call him a sweet witch? he'd reject anyone else who tried. if hwylryn belonged to other people, how would he feel? he's capable of it, but- ]
I'll always belong to Norna. And you'll always belong to Gwawlyn and Balthazar.
[ he would not ask this to change, it's an impossibility. he loves Norna in a way he won't ever be able to describe and he knows, he feels, that Hwylryn feels similarly about them.
his fingers find hwylryn's on his cheek, resting there like they did the very first day they tripped into all of this. ]
But beyond that, if this is what you want...I'd be happy to give it to you. And it would make me happy too.
[ he's never been wanted before, but he's finally no longer deaf to the cries of his own heart. ]
( Hwylryn doesn't know what sort of answer he expects - this is unexplored territory, both exciting and anxious. He doesn't know if he would limit Ish, and he doesn't know how it feels to be so intertwined with someone else - because connection, in itself, are ties that bind you, for better or for worse. And this is why things of magic are so terribly alone, so shameless of their natures - unfettered by firm connection, and all other things.
But he wouldn't know how he likes it until he tries, right? If it were worth the compromise for Primrose, it's worth this much for Ish. And he wants to try these things - all things - with Ish, more than anything, and in this way they might come to know the shape of themselves, together.
So when the answer does come, his heart blooms warm, and it reaches from his heart to the tips of his ears, his smile bright. )
I want you, so if you give yourself to me, how couldn't I be happy? How couldn't I wish to dive deep to the ocean's depths and back, knowing that having me would make you happy, too? That our hearts align?
( And that's no turn of phrase - were he himself, were they by the ocean (and surely they would be, if Hwylryn had his way), he would have been off with Ish - would have taken him diving down, then back up into the sun; then caught himself, and dove away with him forever.
In agreement: )
... You are of Norna the way you are of your eyes; your hair, your lips. ( His gaze is fond. ) And I am of Gwawlyn and Balthazar in this way, too. If I were to compete with Norna, then I may as well compete with your body for holding you and your heart for keeping your feelings.
Every part of you is dear to me, from that which is Norna's to that which is mine.
( He wanted to try saying it! Hehe!! It's fun; his heart races. Ah, he can't help it - he kisses him. )
... And I'm really happy you're going to have her back. I'm so, so happy for you.
[ ish wants to ask again if he's sure, because when he speaks like this, it is in absolutes. he had said forever without thinking about it, but it's lingered on his tongue: sometimes sweet, sometimes heavy.
he swallows the kiss and hwylryn both, letting them settle into himself properly. ]
She might be mad at me, but... let's talk about that later. [ he's afraid that mixing both his feelings of her and his blossoming feelings for hwylyrn will mix like oil and water. he needs sometime to settle and he honestly needs a break from working as he has been. ]
Don't change who you are for me, because I want you to be yourself above all else. Even if that worries me, I can handle it.
You're mine and I'm yours. I won't forget that and I know you won't either.
[ it's not really a warning, but a proclamation to the world even if they're the only two who will hear it. that's all that matters anyway, isn't it?
he drops his hand to wrap them both around hwylryn tightly, the embrace he's been needing since yesterday. ]
( He knows. They know. But it makes him happy that they both say it. )
... And I want you to be just as you are, too. Because that's the Ish I've come to love as I do.
( "Love" is also a word he's been careful with, for someone who uses it as freely as he does - and yet he slips it in here, obliquely and stripped of the full phrase but not the full meaning, furtive and mischievous the way he might steal a kiss; the way he does press into Ish's embrace, and holds him tenderly in turn. )
... Even if she's upset with you... I'll be beside you through it. Even if I'm not there, I am. And I don't intend to be apart from you, ever.
( Wherever this scolding - or worse - takes place, he will be beside Ish, whether or not Ish allows him to be there, hand in hand. And though the idea that Norna may be cross with him is puzzling, he resigns to the idea that he does not know the nuance of their relationship - and if Ish loves her all the same, and he doesn't want to speak of it now, then he accepts it.
After all, how Gwawlyn would treat Hwylryn would probably arouse alarm in those who look on. But could Hwylryn do anything but love him? It must be the same for Ish.
He presses his cheek to the side of Ish's head, still holding him tight, lips murmuring in his ear (just a little bully): )
Do you mind if I spoil you, a little bit?
( He's referring to the snacks he brought... but he also 100% is Not going to move from Ish's lap. He lives here now, forevermore. Implications forthcoming. )
[ love? they've said a lot of crazy things to each other this past week, but that single word stops his heart. he knows about love, he's felt love before, he knows how powerful it is and how it can change everything. but it's been a long, long, long, long time since he's had it directed at him, in a non-mocking capacity.
he thinks back to what he asked hwylryn, which really wasn't that long ago:
"So if I said we could meet again tomorrow, you'd fall in love with me?"
"If you meant it. If it meant something to you."
at the time, he had viewed hwylryn as who would love everyone and everything with little thought put into it. but they had come to an understanding, and ish had come to see him that night as a fellow entity who was dictated by their emotions entirely, freely. a fondness had turned into more from a simple wish.
ish swallows, ducking but not entirely hiding against hwylryn. his next words are a whisper, as warm as his cheeks are. ]
I want to say it back to you properly, so please wait for me. [ not now, it's too much right now. not because he doesn't feel it, but because when he says it, he wants it to be done in full declaration and no fear.
the whisper in his ear is doing nothing for his rabbit beating heart, on top of everything else.
( Ah, he'd tucked it away in there, like he didn't want it to be found (though, really, he did) - and Ish had found it anyway, and returned it to him like a seed in bloom. It warms his cheeks so much they hurt, his chest a rhythm he's never known. )
... I'll wait a thousand years, if you need it. And in those thousand years, I'll be yours the whole time.
( He's gone this long without belonging to anyone - without confessing love, or being addressed with the same love in return. Why not wait a little longer? Why wouldn't Ish be worth the wait?
He exhales, warm.
He still needs to say it proper, too - the full phrase, undisguised. But, until the time is right, he'll say this: )
... I may always be of Gwawlyn, of Balthazar. But, Ish... you're something I've never had, never known before. So, I think... maybe, one day, I can say, I'm of Gwawlyn, of Balthazar... and of Ish, too.
I won't take that long!!! I just— [ this is more him being embarrassed than fussy. ]
—when I was younger, I was friends with every human I met. Or I tried to be, anyway. I loved them all, the faces they made, the way they laughed and smiled, how they interacted with one another and grew from it.
It was a human who named me, not Norna.
After they broke her, I never thought I would ever feel that way towards someone again. Even when I realized I liked you I....
[ gently nuzzling whatever part of hwylryn he can reach. when you can't come up for air, you just go deeper. ]
It must be because I was born impure, I was born with emotions I wasn't supposed to have. I can't get rid of them.
But I'm not stupid. I can read the hearts of others so obviously I can read my own. And the point is—I've never been given anything to call my own besides my name, and the power to grant wishes.
So giving yourself to me is... [ he'll find the words for it eventually, but for now the kiss he presses between their lips is full of the emotion he can't yet say. ]
( Ah... He mood dims into something a little more somber as Ish recounts how he's been hurt - something that aches in his chest as if it'd happened to him. Even if the conclusion of this recollection is a kind one - how couldn't he wish tragedy had never happened to Ish at all?
He returns the kiss with equal measure; or, maybe a little more - mixed in with feelings about Ish, about Gwawlyn, about Balthazar, about Norna - about their strange, distinct but in so many ways similar, paths that have led them here, to be caverns of need with nothing to fill them.
No - that's not true, right? Because - from the sounds of it - both of them have their empties filled with love. Despite themselves. Despite how much it's hurt them.
Into the kiss: )
... What part of nature is pure? What mountain, seed, or water comes filtered and refined? ( His hands come around, cupping his face, kissing him long— ) I hate that you've suffered so much for your heart. But if you didn't have it, you wouldn't have mine, would you?
( Kiss!!!! )
And if I could give you more than me, if I could give you the world, I would. Maybe I just need to find a way.
[ ahhh, he's melting. he was flustered a moment ago but now he feels like he's overheating; all his emotions melting into a passion he can't quite contain.
praise is something he often rejects unless framed in a certain way, but true acceptance and genuine desire is his true weakness. ]
I only want you. You're all that I need. [ for a moment, a very brief moment, all he sees and feels is the sea and the sky. the ring of roses around his heart scent the sea breeze.
he presses their lips together again and this one is a chain, one after the other, a flower crown for them both. ]
Gwawlyn was terribly fond of the twins, despite himself. He adored himself, his pride; and, Hwyrlyn - he took for granted. Balthazar, too, fell in step with this - how could he not, when he was Gwawlyn in lesser form? In the thousands of years since, he's known endless creatures, magical and not; horrified and amazed; obsessed and avoidant, but - it has never, truly, been him, and only him, that they wanted. He had always been, maybe, a part of someone's happiness, but not enough.
Just him? He wants to ask, indulgently, narcissistic. Just him, when he is a weightless, whimsy thing - no gravitas at all; surely, no substance. Is that enough?
He meets the chain and extends it, his heart not so much a beat as it is the roar of the ocean. Where there lips meet he feels the clear sky, the sun; the ocean rolling broad beneath it; the shore far, far away.
And he'll indulge in Ish for a long while - finding all his passion no longer in his words, but his lips - until eventually they do let their lips part, though Hwylryn rests his forehead against Ish's own, close. )
... And here I came here thinking you were upset with me...
( Well, upset enough to persist in being mad - he does think Ish was upset at the time, if not tired and frustrated. But, you know. It feels silly to think on how he came in now. )
( Hwylryn's arms settle around Ish's shoulders, loosely - caressing the back of his neck lightly, fondly, pink-cheeked and content like he's basking in the sun as much as he is Ish's expression - and, in some ways, he is. )
Ah... Primrose chewed me out for that, too. I'm sorry. I'll... be more careful.
( Primrose and friends, but anyway. And, in the same way... it makes him happy that Ish was concerned for him, too... )
... But you seemed so tired, I don't know... you didn't use your magic, either. Were you okay? I thought maybe you had to show up at a bad time for you.
Mmmm...I want you to do what you want. But I'll always be worried for you whenever you're in danger. Don't forget that, because I won't.
[ he will deal and he will be stressed, but he's drawn to Hwylryn's impulsiveness all the same.
a yawn, because now he's tired for more reasons than he was before. (he wouldn't consider it a bad thing) ]
I am tired. But no sleeping for me just yet. [ he knows hwylryn would try to pin him down for a nap and as much as he wants one (only because it would be with him), he's still "I'll sleep when I'm dead-I mean I'll sleep after this is over."
he'll let his eyes slide closed momentarily, some indulgence for them both. ]
The execution space is the inner most part of my domain. It's where I'm the strongest but also the weakest. And rewinding time is a real pain.
I wasn't made to hold all the magic I currently do, so it's kind of like...stretching a rope taut until it's just at the point of snapping.
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he doesn't look up when he's approached, but- ]
Hwylryn.
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... Am I interrupting?
( He'll enter since he was implicitly invited in, and though he spends a moment studying Ish and his work, he'll pass Ish to set the bucket gently on the table and begin setting out his things. )
I wanted to congratulate you, from the bottom of my heart.
( He sets out the tea tray with particular care, given its tiers. The effort occupies a few moments, where he purses his lips, quiet. )
... I also wanted to apologize, if you would have it.
( He sets down a bottle, also gentle. There's barely a clink a that doesn't come from his jewelry, anyway - as he works. )
But... I can return when you aren't busy, if this isn't an ideal time.
( This is all partly because he wasn't considerate of Ish, so... he'd rather not do the same thing again... But he might be feeling more hesitant because he had Primrose really on his case yesterday, and it's still fresh in his mind. )
/3
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that sure is midriff he's seeing and more than that, it's hwylryn dressed in red. please ignore one of the floating books falling to the floor with a thud. he'll pick it up later. ]
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Come here. [ holding out his hand, sit with him. ]
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More than anything, he seems a mixture of sad and relieved - relieved that Ish isn't Mad-mad at him (yesterday was stressful for him), but sad that Ish seems so tired.
Despite everything he's balancing in his heart, he does take his hand, lacing their fingers, and he does come to sit beside him on the chaise - sitting right up next to him, looking up at him like 🥺... i'm sowwyyyyy... )
... You look tired.
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Then do your best to keep me awake.
[ he'll make to move hwylryn to his lap if allowed. ]
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Though still a little ragged from yesterday, the shift in Hwylryn's demeanor is like sun crossing the sea. His eyes shine bright, and without hesitation, he'll help shift himself onto Ish's lap - where he's wanted to be since last trial - gently, affectionately, taking his face in both his hands. )
... When now, more than ever, you deserve the rest?
( He noses him affectionately - more the gesture of a dragon than someone in the shape of a person. )
But I'm not the sort to deny my sweet witch his reward.
( He kisses him - light at first, and cute; but his lips part, and on his tongue there is the taste of fruit and tea treats and chocolate - his samplings from the tea and wintering rooms before he decided to bring them in.
The way he kisses him, rather than apology, seems to say I missed you - as if the time since trial was unbearable, as much as it's barely a drop of time in his long life; as if seeing him, but only seeing him upset, made the ache that much worse. And it did. )
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all of this is to say he was not expecting kisses, much less kisses like these. not that it stops him from accepting them, a relieved sigh escaping his lips somewhere in the middle.
he pulls back once he thinks hwylryn has been able to breathe again himself, because he feels that ache in him through his lips and tongue.
a now familiar flush paints his cheeks when they part. ]
"My" sweet witch? [ bemused but curious. ]
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It had slipped out so easily, despite his reservation - he'd been trying to be careful with his words around Ish, trying to gauge their pace with care, because he's never... had someone who liked him in turn, like this, to this extent. He hadn't gone as far as daring to think of Ish as solely for him - or so he'd thought. But maybe... a part of him wanted it more than his logical mind told himself to heel, and be patient.
His cheeks warm a little as he hesitates, but he decides all he can do is give voice to his heart, as he always does. )
... I want you to be. Can you?
( He brushes Ish's hidden cheek lightly with his thumb. Ish's face is so endearing, as always... he wishes he could swallow him up (metaphorically)... )
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but first he has a question of his own. ]
Then would you only be mine?
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He had never been so contained - to belong to but one person, to define himself by someone else. To reduce his vocabulary, how he may communicate with others, like Yoru. And it may as well be forever, if their lifespans proceeded, uninterrupted.
He strokes Ish's cheek with his thumb as he considers this. )
... Yeah. I would be. But only if you want that.
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he doesn't want to chain hwylryn, because one of the things that attracts him the most is his free spirit. yet hwylryn is the one who asked him for these terms: saying no would be denying him in a matter of the heart. that's not something he wants to do ever, if he can help.
maybe he shouldn't have said "only" because he knows that you can belong to more than one person, even if it's never something he's considered himself. but that's truly what he thought: who else would call him a sweet witch? he'd reject anyone else who tried. if hwylryn belonged to other people, how would he feel? he's capable of it, but- ]
I'll always belong to Norna. And you'll always belong to Gwawlyn and Balthazar.
[ he would not ask this to change, it's an impossibility. he loves Norna in a way he won't ever be able to describe and he knows, he feels, that Hwylryn feels similarly about them.
his fingers find hwylryn's on his cheek, resting there like they did the very first day they tripped into all of this. ]
But beyond that, if this is what you want...I'd be happy to give it to you. And it would make me happy too.
[ he's never been wanted before, but he's finally no longer deaf to the cries of his own heart. ]
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But he wouldn't know how he likes it until he tries, right? If it were worth the compromise for Primrose, it's worth this much for Ish. And he wants to try these things - all things - with Ish, more than anything, and in this way they might come to know the shape of themselves, together.
So when the answer does come, his heart blooms warm, and it reaches from his heart to the tips of his ears, his smile bright. )
I want you, so if you give yourself to me, how couldn't I be happy? How couldn't I wish to dive deep to the ocean's depths and back, knowing that having me would make you happy, too? That our hearts align?
( And that's no turn of phrase - were he himself, were they by the ocean (and surely they would be, if Hwylryn had his way), he would have been off with Ish - would have taken him diving down, then back up into the sun; then caught himself, and dove away with him forever.
In agreement: )
... You are of Norna the way you are of your eyes; your hair, your lips. ( His gaze is fond. ) And I am of Gwawlyn and Balthazar in this way, too. If I were to compete with Norna, then I may as well compete with your body for holding you and your heart for keeping your feelings.
Every part of you is dear to me, from that which is Norna's to that which is mine.
( He wanted to try saying it! Hehe!! It's fun; his heart races. Ah, he can't help it - he kisses him. )
... And I'm really happy you're going to have her back. I'm so, so happy for you.
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[ ish wants to ask again if he's sure, because when he speaks like this, it is in absolutes. he had said forever without thinking about it, but it's lingered on his tongue: sometimes sweet, sometimes heavy.
he swallows the kiss and hwylryn both, letting them settle into himself properly. ]
She might be mad at me, but... let's talk about that later. [ he's afraid that mixing both his feelings of her and his blossoming feelings for hwylyrn will mix like oil and water. he needs sometime to settle and he honestly needs a break from working as he has been. ]
Don't change who you are for me, because I want you to be yourself above all else. Even if that worries me, I can handle it.
You're mine and I'm yours. I won't forget that and I know you won't either.
[ it's not really a warning, but a proclamation to the world even if they're the only two who will hear it. that's all that matters anyway, isn't it?
he drops his hand to wrap them both around hwylryn tightly, the embrace he's been needing since yesterday. ]
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( He knows. They know. But it makes him happy that they both say it. )
... And I want you to be just as you are, too. Because that's the Ish I've come to love as I do.
( "Love" is also a word he's been careful with, for someone who uses it as freely as he does - and yet he slips it in here, obliquely and stripped of the full phrase but not the full meaning, furtive and mischievous the way he might steal a kiss; the way he does press into Ish's embrace, and holds him tenderly in turn. )
... Even if she's upset with you... I'll be beside you through it. Even if I'm not there, I am. And I don't intend to be apart from you, ever.
( Wherever this scolding - or worse - takes place, he will be beside Ish, whether or not Ish allows him to be there, hand in hand. And though the idea that Norna may be cross with him is puzzling, he resigns to the idea that he does not know the nuance of their relationship - and if Ish loves her all the same, and he doesn't want to speak of it now, then he accepts it.
After all, how Gwawlyn would treat Hwylryn would probably arouse alarm in those who look on. But could Hwylryn do anything but love him? It must be the same for Ish.
He presses his cheek to the side of Ish's head, still holding him tight, lips murmuring in his ear (just a little bully): )
Do you mind if I spoil you, a little bit?
( He's referring to the snacks he brought... but he also 100% is Not going to move from Ish's lap. He lives here now, forevermore. Implications forthcoming. )
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he thinks back to what he asked hwylryn, which really wasn't that long ago:
"So if I said we could meet again tomorrow, you'd fall in love with me?"
"If you meant it. If it meant something to you."
at the time, he had viewed hwylryn as who would love everyone and everything with little thought put into it. but they had come to an understanding, and ish had come to see him that night as a fellow entity who was dictated by their emotions entirely, freely. a fondness had turned into more from a simple wish.
ish swallows, ducking but not entirely hiding against hwylryn. his next words are a whisper, as warm as his cheeks are. ]
I want to say it back to you properly, so please wait for me. [ not now, it's too much right now. not because he doesn't feel it, but because when he says it, he wants it to be done in full declaration and no fear.
the whisper in his ear is doing nothing for his rabbit beating heart, on top of everything else.
a breath in and again he repeats- ]
I'm all yours.
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... I'll wait a thousand years, if you need it. And in those thousand years, I'll be yours the whole time.
( He's gone this long without belonging to anyone - without confessing love, or being addressed with the same love in return. Why not wait a little longer? Why wouldn't Ish be worth the wait?
He exhales, warm.
He still needs to say it proper, too - the full phrase, undisguised. But, until the time is right, he'll say this: )
... I may always be of Gwawlyn, of Balthazar. But, Ish... you're something I've never had, never known before. So, I think... maybe, one day, I can say, I'm of Gwawlyn, of Balthazar... and of Ish, too.
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—when I was younger, I was friends with every human I met. Or I tried to be, anyway. I loved them all, the faces they made, the way they laughed and smiled, how they interacted with one another and grew from it.
It was a human who named me, not Norna.
After they broke her, I never thought I would ever feel that way towards someone again. Even when I realized I liked you I....
[ gently nuzzling whatever part of hwylryn he can reach. when you can't come up for air, you just go deeper. ]
It must be because I was born impure, I was born with emotions I wasn't supposed to have. I can't get rid of them.
But I'm not stupid. I can read the hearts of others so obviously I can read my own. And the point is—I've never been given anything to call my own besides my name, and the power to grant wishes.
So giving yourself to me is... [ he'll find the words for it eventually, but for now the kiss he presses between their lips is full of the emotion he can't yet say. ]
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He returns the kiss with equal measure; or, maybe a little more - mixed in with feelings about Ish, about Gwawlyn, about Balthazar, about Norna - about their strange, distinct but in so many ways similar, paths that have led them here, to be caverns of need with nothing to fill them.
No - that's not true, right? Because - from the sounds of it - both of them have their empties filled with love. Despite themselves. Despite how much it's hurt them.
Into the kiss: )
... What part of nature is pure? What mountain, seed, or water comes filtered and refined? ( His hands come around, cupping his face, kissing him long— ) I hate that you've suffered so much for your heart. But if you didn't have it, you wouldn't have mine, would you?
( Kiss!!!! )
And if I could give you more than me, if I could give you the world, I would. Maybe I just need to find a way.
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praise is something he often rejects unless framed in a certain way, but true acceptance and genuine desire is his true weakness. ]
I only want you. You're all that I need. [ for a moment, a very brief moment, all he sees and feels is the sea and the sky. the ring of roses around his heart scent the sea breeze.
he presses their lips together again and this one is a chain, one after the other, a flower crown for them both. ]
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Gwawlyn was terribly fond of the twins, despite himself. He adored himself, his pride; and, Hwyrlyn - he took for granted. Balthazar, too, fell in step with this - how could he not, when he was Gwawlyn in lesser form? In the thousands of years since, he's known endless creatures, magical and not; horrified and amazed; obsessed and avoidant, but - it has never, truly, been him, and only him, that they wanted. He had always been, maybe, a part of someone's happiness, but not enough.
Just him? He wants to ask, indulgently, narcissistic. Just him, when he is a weightless, whimsy thing - no gravitas at all; surely, no substance. Is that enough?
He meets the chain and extends it, his heart not so much a beat as it is the roar of the ocean. Where there lips meet he feels the clear sky, the sun; the ocean rolling broad beneath it; the shore far, far away.
And he'll indulge in Ish for a long while - finding all his passion no longer in his words, but his lips - until eventually they do let their lips part, though Hwylryn rests his forehead against Ish's own, close. )
... And here I came here thinking you were upset with me...
( Well, upset enough to persist in being mad - he does think Ish was upset at the time, if not tired and frustrated. But, you know. It feels silly to think on how he came in now. )
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blink, blink. ]
I wasn't upset with you, just worried. I didn't like seeing you hurt.
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Ah... Primrose chewed me out for that, too. I'm sorry. I'll... be more careful.
( Primrose and friends, but anyway. And, in the same way... it makes him happy that Ish was concerned for him, too... )
... But you seemed so tired, I don't know... you didn't use your magic, either. Were you okay? I thought maybe you had to show up at a bad time for you.
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[ he will deal and he will be stressed, but he's drawn to Hwylryn's impulsiveness all the same.
a yawn, because now he's tired for more reasons than he was before. (he wouldn't consider it a bad thing) ]
I am tired. But no sleeping for me just yet. [ he knows hwylryn would try to pin him down for a nap and as much as he wants one (only because it would be with him), he's still "I'll sleep when I'm dead-I mean I'll sleep after this is over."
he'll let his eyes slide closed momentarily, some indulgence for them both. ]
The execution space is the inner most part of my domain. It's where I'm the strongest but also the weakest. And rewinding time is a real pain.
I wasn't made to hold all the magic I currently do, so it's kind of like...stretching a rope taut until it's just at the point of snapping.
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